Bridesmaids' Requests

I was trying to think of a really nice way to ask a few of my girlfriends to honor me by being my bridesmaids. So, I searched the Internet and came across some pretty cool "bridesmaids request" greeting cards. But, I decided that I wanted something a little more personal than the same card for each friend.

I created my request cards on Kodak.com. I searched for recent pics of me and my g-friends and used one of the templates for greeting cards to load the photos and my own personal message. With each friend, I put our names at the top and the year we met underneath. (sidenote: I'd considered putting the PLACE we met as well, but didn't want to take up to much space on the card). Here's one, so you can take a look at the final product:



And you can choose how many pics you want to use. Here's one I did for another friend, using only two pictures:

Also, on the second card, I included a nickname I call her, to make it even more personal.


For my MatronOH, I actually included a photo of me as her MOH.


The butterfly theme on the cards was chosen because I thought it best reflected my personality...plus I just liked it. And the verbiage was a bit diff for each friend, but generally said:
"Will you do me the honor of being my bridemaid?/Will you do me the privelege of being my Maid/Matron of Honor? (I promise not to be a bridezilla or make you wear an ugly dress!) 'My truest friends are those with whom I am my truest self."


These were obviously easy to make (with the exception of finding the photos!), and at $2.50 a pop, pretty worth it.



I went to Touche' Touchet bakery in Columbia, MD and had them create thick/huge sugar cookies, in the shape of an autumn leaf (for September wedding), with burgundy- and saffron- colored sugar coating (the brightest of our wedding colors), individually wrapped in celophane and tied with pewter-colored wire ribbon. I mailed these to my unsuspecting friends and waited anxiously for replies!

Engagement Party and Dinner

Okay, so it's been a while since I've done an entry. This school semester has been KILLER.

Lemme catch you up:

Back in October, our friends, Kia and Mardi, threw us two events: an engagement party at Ozio's Martini Lounge in D.C. and a dinner at Bertucci's Italian Restaurant. They are SOOOO sweet for doing this!

Both events were very informal and we had a blast. While the engagement party was open to whomever wanted to come celebrate with us, the dinner was closed to just our bridal party and their dates. Kia provided champagne and Mardi did a toast to us, which was oddly embarassing since it felt like ALL EYES were on us in the restaurant.

Mardi also made the tastiest and CUTEST cupcakes, vanilla flavored with grand marnier filling and iced with buttercream frosting....*drool*. Each cupcake had a hand-cut picture of me and/or the Man. She later told me that she'd been trying to make the frosting Saffron-colored, but no dice. LOL! I loved them anyway and totally appreciated the effort:

The Man and I had a BLAST at both events and are really grateful for Love. :-)

Rainy Days

When the Man and I were in the Bahamas, one particular day was filled with rain. We left breakfast and headed to the outdoor patio around the pool only to be disappointed by the downpour.

As we stood there, I, with my bottom lip pouting while holding our beach bag, and him, with his signature frown, staring out from the glass doors to the cafeteria, the sound of the rain drops splattering the pavement was not as soothing as it should have been. We looked at each other.

"Wait one second..." I said, and handed him my bag to hold.

He watched me curiously as I covered my head with my hands (to no avail) and darted to the stand where they distributed beach towels. Under the awning, I requested three towels and turned to survey the pool area. After eyeballing two lounge chairs underneath a wide beach/pool umbrella, I waved to the Man to get his attention.

I pointed to the chairs and shrugged. He shrugged back...and headed to the poolside bar for daiquiris.

That was an interesting time, our sitting with our respective books to read, while under that umbrella, keeping relatively dry. We barely said a word, but occasionally exchanged a smile and a "this is nice". Pretty soon, the rain stopped and the patio filled with people.

I had an epiphany about our relationship today, as I remembered this little incident, and decided there was a moral to this story:

"When life tries to rain on our Happy, I'll grab an umbrella, you get the drinks, and we're gonna make it do what it do, baby!"

I hope we remember that thirty years from now...!

This Business About Bridesmaids

Okay, so a friend and I had a conversation a while back about the role of bridesmaids and such. By the end of the conversation, she and I had recounted how many times each of us had actually been a bridesmaid/maid-of-honor, how involved we'd been, and how much money we'd spent on dresses that now hung in the closets. We'd come to a consensus that when one agrees to be her friend's bridesmaid, she in essence is saying that she relinquishes her own for the good of her friend (that's the clean version of what was said anyway).

Basically, whenever I was a bridesmaid, I worked. I treated each friend's wedding as though it were my own, with regard to my commitment. For my sister, I found dresses for everyone and coordinated significant details, even while away at school! And for her and all of my friends, I coordinated the bridal shower and bachelorette activities...stuffed and addressed envelopes...organized and put together favors...the list goes on and on.

And never once was this done begrudgingly. I LOVED seeing my friends happy!

I certainly don't want to be surrounded by negative energy that wouldn't enjoy the process as much as I have in the past. Of course, not every bridesmaid sees the responsibility involved. Many would prefer to just wear a pretty dress and stand at the front of the congregation. And some of your friends don't even want to do that much. Which is why it's sometimes very tricky. Some people see being a bridesmaid as a measure of the friendship...when it truly doesn't have to be the case. I'm way more methodical in my thinking and coordination, so I'm hoping that no one will think too deeply into it all.

In the end, I am going to have to think carefully. I'm fortunate to have many people with whom I am friends, but I don't want to overwhelm anyone with what needs to be done...since I'm totally on the "do-it-yourself" high. I suppose those whom I will ask will be friends who I know will love this process just as much as I do (if not more!) and surround each other (and me) with positivity and encouragement.

It's a dirty job...but not thankless. The reward comes in knowing your loved one had the best day of her life...and even better when you know she'd do the same for you. I don't expect a "perfect" day. I expect a fun and eventful affair with some highs and some lows.

At any rate, I promise not to be a bridezilla! LOL!!!

Long engagements

So, a little while ago, I'd mentioned to the Man that, since we are both really big on academia and reading (he: more into books about history, economics, and philosophy, me: more into fictional novels and autobiographies about social figures), that we should have books as our centerpieces.

I'm almost positive he blanked out at the idea of using his vast collection of books, built over the past ten-plus years, as mere centerpieces on tables lined with people who could care less about Plato's Republic and Warren Buffet's life-story. Oops.

But, the other day, we were sitting at the table chatting and he mentioned that he'd Googled "book centerpieces" and grabbed some great ideas after seeing some cool pics. GOTTA love a man who's into the whole wedding thing (or just wants to make sure we're doing the most cost effective options)!

So, I jumped online and Googled it right there, and came across this blog, written by a girl in Oregon about -- of all things -- her long engagement (October 2008 to July 2010)!

The heavens opened up, the angels began to sing, and alas, I felt I'd found a kindred spirit. Someone who could understand the angst of the long-term betrothal. About having to prepare and in the meantime, balance life and everything.

It's not to so much the part about being engaged for a long time. The Man and I are at peace with our plans and just as happy as can be. It's more or less the response every time I share our wedding date: "When? Why on earth is it so far away?"

While I can understand the natural reaction, the more amused side of me is interested in why anyone else would be concerned with how soon or far away our wedding date is. It's actually really funny, if I stop and ponder on it for a while. From our parents, it makes the most sense. I mean, for pity's sake....grandbabies don't make themselves! LOL

But, from our friends and other family members (and COMPLETE relative strangers, in some cases)...I'm reeeeeally curious as to what the rush is. We happen to be two frugal people who would much rather pay for our wedding and honeymoon in cash rather than credit. Also, I, for one, would love to be done with this Master's program and have him through most of his certifications before having to be inundated with the stress of planning a wedding.

In the end, really, that's our business. The true celebration comes in the commitment for us to spend the rest of our lives together and build a foundation for a lasting marriage. I know people mean well, but I'm grateful most to those who truly share in that celebration without being overly concerned about when it will happen. :-)

I. Gorman Jewelers

Last Friday night, the Man took me to the jeweler where he'd had my ring designed so that I could meet Venita, his sales associate.

It was like no visit to the store I'd experienced in recent years.

I.Gorman Jewelers is located at 1133 20th Street, NW, in downtown D.C. As we walked through the glass doors and stepped across two brightly colored round floor mats (that seemed to jump out at you since the rest of the store appeared to be neutral toned and....well....shiny), there was an enthusiastic, singing voice that greeted the Man by his first name.

Hm.

My eyes followed the direction of the sound to land on a beautiful woman in her 30s or 40s, dressed expensively and adorned minimally, but with jewelry that spoke with her.

Venita exchanged pleasantries with him and had I not known better, I'd be POSITIVE that they'd been old friends for years. She then turned to me, greeted me as some woman she'd been dying to meet and, with a knowing smile, she congratulated me as she reached for my left hand.

"Let me see your ring," she said. And as I extended my hand, she smoothly touched the white band and asked, "Mind if I clean this for you?"

Again...hm.

Venita offered the Man and I a drink. "...a glass of champagne? Beer? Bottled water...?"

My "Hm." was now accompanied by a raised eyebrow. I could hardly remember such personal customer service. I half expected her to ask me about the Boy and how school was going...

Anyway, she introduced us to a visiting jewelry designer from Germany and his collection. The Man and I thought it the perfect opportunity to look at wedding bands, so we did. Mr. Conservative "I-just-want-a-plain-platinum-or-white-gold-band" began eyeballing a beautiful contemporary design. After he tried on about twelve [non-plain, mind you] rings, he realized that he was most charmed by a pulchritudinous (lovelovelove that word) palladium band with three stones channel-set between two etched lines along the outer circumference.

Hmmmm.....

Meanwhile, I shared my dilemma with Venita of trying to find a wedding band for myself that would sit flush up against my own three-stone ring and asked her if I should just have it custom-made (since the Man had custom designed the engagement ring with her). Her response was that doing so would leave me with a band that, when worn alone, would always look like it was missing its other half (a custom band would have to have horizontal grooves to fit into the prongs of the engagement ring and by itself, the grooves would look random and arbitrary). So, I tried on a few bands myself and was pretty satisfied with a channel set diamond eternity band. There were different widths, but the widest ones, while sensational worn alone, distracted from my engagement ring, so Venita suggested a thin band with a flatter surface (to snuggle a little closer to my ring).

(Hmmm...I wonder if I can get it with alternating diamonds and yellow sapphires....)

By the way, when Venita returned my ring to me, I seriously thought she was showing me another three-stone, because it looked BRAND NEW. My mouth dropped at the sparkle. She informed me that I was getting lotion and oils and soap all around and under the ring and that, over time, it was covering it up. Afterward, she handed me an iGorman jewelry cleaner bottle and invited me to come back any time for a cleaning.

I can't remember having so much fun at a store that didn't require my taking off and trying on different pairs of shoes and boots...!

Location Scouting...

So, a friend of ours noted that we have a HUGE advantage in knowing our date and planning a wedding so far in advance and suggested that we book our ceremony and reception sites PRONTO.

After we finished laughing and realized she was serious, we looked at each other seriously and started working on our guest list to get an idea of how many people we were talkin'. Then, we told our parents to put together their guest lists. :-/

Before we knew it, my proposed "100 guests, small and intimate" had bloomed to a full grown "250 guests, let's get it poppin'!"

The Man and I knew it was going to be September, and he had an inkling that, due to my obsession with things yellow, I was going to lean toward that for color scheming. In an effort to not dominate the colors (saffron and pewter) I suggested we add a touch of burgundy for depth, and after asking me if it was cool if he donned a burgundy and gold Washington Redskins cap for some of the wedding photos (of course, I was cool with this!), our colors were finalized!

Next came our discussion of what we wanted in a venue. The criteria wasn't too difficult. The Man loves simplicity and clean, modern lines. I could work with that. I love rich, historic sites with artistic appeal that offer inspiration and awesome architecture. We narrowed it down (with the help of my awesome friends) to quite a few places including The University of Maryland's Alumni Center (not historic, but my alma mater and the architecture is clean-lined and simple); the National Museum of Women in the Arts (need I say more?); the Strathmore (fanTAStic design); and the Great Room at Savage Mill.

We both absolutely LOVED the Great Room. Set in a refurbished old textile mill , the Great Room was a wide open blank palette with raw highlights. The broad skylight filters natural light into the room and fills the area where the dance floor would lay. The large, elegant windows offer a certain regal charm to the entire space. After seeing photos of the room transformed for an event, the Man and I were SOLD! I was so excited as I told my friends who'd been hunting for me: We finally found a space and they are giving us the right of first refusal!

One of our biggest concerns was the cost of catering. This caused us to have to make some cuts to the guest list (which hurts me deeply) in order to bring the numbers down (caterers charge "per plate"). With the Great Room, the sole caterer was reasonably priced and had terrific reviews throughout the web.

And, then...after all of that...last week....he sent me THIS. And what baffles me is that he KNOWS me well enough to know how naturally indecisive I am. For him to add another option, completely confusing me and leaving me bewildered...well, that's just incomprehensible.

Buuuuut......Westminster Hall was PERFECT for us! It has the history we both were looking for (Edgar Allen Poe is buried there)...the old century architecture that I fondly admire...and we can have both the ceremony and the reception in the same place. And on top of all of that, they have 30+ caterers listed, including Putting on the Ritz (the company that the Great Room uses).

However, while the actual site is perfect, the location is a bit of a distance for some of our friends and relatives who live in and around DC and may not necessarily like the idea of travelling 45 minutes to an hour to get to downtown Baltimore (someone said that should help dwindle down our guest list! HA!).

Anyway, this is where we are now. Keep you posted!

Sooo....the whole "September" thing

Okay, so the Man and I starting dating in September of 2006. For me, it was refreshing to be with someone who KNEW what he wanted and wasn't afraid to assert it first. At that time, I'd pretty much given up on being found by "Mr. Right" and was pretty focused on building my nonprofit organization. The Man flat out courted me and I really couldn't refuse his confidence.

So, Labor Day weekend of 2006 (September 1st through 4th), after talking on the phone for about a month, he agreed to take me to the airport as a favor (I paid him gas money) as I was going to Miami...solo (my friends had bailed on the trip but I was still ready for some sun!). While I was down there, the strangest thing happened: I found myself on the phone with him when I should have been out partying! We talked about current events, politics, sports, and basically caught up with what had been going on since we'd last seen each other in our high school Architectural Drafting class (when I'd had a itty bitty little crush on him...). When I returned from Miami, he'd picked me up from the airport, carried my heavy bag to my apartment and then asked if he could take me out to dinner the Friday of the same week (September 8th).

Our first date was at Utopia on U Street, and I remember the orange polo shirt he wore. We had a great time, and ended up going out again the following weekend. In September of 2006, we probably saw each other two to three times a week, and by our date on September 29th, he'd told me that I was his "lady."

Since I didn't believe him (or like being told who I was), I decided to text him the following morning and ask him what was meant by that (all the muddy relationships without clear direction had pretty much left me cynical). He confirmed that that was what he'd said and changed it to a question (good for him) on September 30th.

So, that's the story of September.

The Proposal - September 5, 2009

Okay, so I've told this over and over again...and now it's posted so I [hopefully] don't have to tell it verbally again! LOL

Short Version (the Man calls this the "Male Version")

The Man proposed to me while we were in the Bahamas, under a nearly full moon on a white adirondack swing set. I was shocked. It was unexpected. I screamed and cried...and nearly knocked the man over...completely ignoring the ringbox in his hand...and then finally accepted his proposal.

Long Version (...naturally...the "Female Version")

The Man and I went to dinner on Saturday night (September 5th) while in the Bahamas. Afterward, we decided to go for a walk around a courtyard that overlooked the beach/ocean (it's where the weddings are held on the resort). We talked about our relationship and reminisced over the last few years (something we commonly do, so it still didn't tip me off that something was coming). Eventually, another couple who'd been occupying a white adirondack swing set got up to leave and we took their spot. While we rocked, we had a random conversation about the clarity of the sky, the beauty of the ocean, and our good fortune that the moon was so bright so we could see everything clearly. At one point, we marvelled at a set of clouds that astonishingly resembled a couple going in for a kiss, right in front of the moon. True story, I promise!

Anyway, after a period of silence:

The Man: "How much do you love me?"
Me: *thinking of something really sappy* "If you took ALL of my love and bottled it up, that ocean out there still wouldn't be able to contain it."
The Man: "Wow...! Do you know how much I love you?"
Me: "How much?"
The Man: "My love for you is bigger than Kanye West's ego!"
Me: *laughter* "Dang...that's a LOT of love!"
We played this game for a little while longer, before:
The Man: "Do you know how much I love you?"
Me: "How much?"
The Man: "I love you so much..."
Me: *giggle* [anticipating a really funny one]
The Man: "I love you sooo much..."
Me: *bubbling with anticipation of a silly example*
The Man: "I love you SO much...." *he stood up* "...that I want to spend the rest of my life with you."
Me: *eyes wide, breath caught in my chest*
The Man: *lowered himself to one knee* "[My FULL Government Name]...will you --"
Me: "AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!" *tears flowing, shaking* "Of COURSE I will!"

I jumped out of the swing grabbed his face with both hands and kissed him....almost knocking him off balance as I joined him on the ground on both of my own knees. Yeah, I know...I wasn't thinking of decorum. LOL
He chuckled and pointed out that I hadn't even looked at the ring he was holding, at which point I felt the pain of my knee on the sandy platform and stood back up. I brushed myself off and tried to regain my composure, giggling the whole time, before looking at the sparkles in the moonlight. I FINALLY extended my hand for him to put the ring on my finger before he stood up.

Because of International rates and such on my cellphone, I had to wait THREE WHOLE DAYS before I could finally spread the word!